Tummy

For some of us our dinner doesn’t always end when we are done eating.

In fact, some of us that suffer from crohn’s and IBS get to watch others eat while we sweat our regret out at our mistake…

We ate Korean last night. As those that read this blog know, I’m Korean, so that really isn’t a big deal.

What was a big deal was when we accidentally ordered the spicy bulgogi cooked in red pepper paste. That’s when the magic began.

I normally sweat when I simply watch other people eating spicy and hot foods. About half a prayer after I ate my first bite, I was done. My stomach tightened like someone had punched me and it instantly felt like a small fiery coal was in my left side. It was wonderful.

I got to literally drip the cups of water I was drinking from my forehead as my family ate and I watched.

Next time you see someone skinny don’t always assume they are in shape or have a balanced diet. I am not in shape, I eat like shit, and I’m skinny as hell. Yes I’ve heard the “wait till it catches up to you!”

That just isn’t the case here. Nothing is gonna catch up to me because nothing stays in me. I know that because I’m writing this post from the toilet…

-Opinionated Man

44.1

@smokendust

Don’t read

Disclaimer: I told you not to read this.

Team of badgers thinks they can take the bear’s job because a fucking walrus runs one fucking thing a day and thinks he can run the world!

The problem with the badgers is they don’t document shit and their processes are nonexistent so they turn an environment into shit.

Then you have to get a team of pigeons in to clean it up because none of the jobs will run. That’s what happens when you have the same people writing code and releasing code. That’s also why you have a separation of power!

Much like god and country… god doesn’t need everyone bothering him on everything.

You also don’t want the same stuff in the same channel because then it breeds mistakes.

Even if you say…

“fuck them pigeons!!”

then the bats come in and audit and you are fucked.

Don’t you miss the pigeons now?

No?

Why?

Because you are a badger!

Fucking zoo.

I’m done with this week.

-OM

@smokendust

Thoughts

I’ve swallowed up a thought.

And tried to give up on it.

It became what I sought.

Back down that well I’d seek for it.

Which thought is it I sought?

As memories appear before me.

Bad thoughts must now be fought.

Why did I look inside of me?

-Opinionated Man

44.1

@smokendust

For Men Only – Tip of the Day

If you want to snack without getting crumbs in the bed and you happen to have gone to a chocolate store just for a certain toffee treat covered with nuts that you don’t want to share…

Just tear the bag and turn it into a plate! With proper aim, it becomes kind of like a bib-plate. Works great, especially if you are turning away so you don’t have to share…

You can thank me later guys! I’m like a super hero.

-Opinionated Man

44.1

@smokendust