Summerset

I saw a summerset upon a dream that was not met.

An object of possibilities, drenched in ideas I bleed.

I pondered upon a golden ticket, hoping some scheme would set.

But forged in fire I had let, a silver ticket is all I met.

It’s not a tragedy when my dear dreams meet misery.

It’s just how it was meant to be as sad songs from me seem to flee.

Back to the forge to dream, a new dream of possibility.

Or give up on being me and let the darkness in you see.

-OM

44.1

Sadness

Could I shoot my sadness in the eye.

And hear it give one last cry.

It simply takes a bullet given.

To feel the madness suddenly driven.

A whisper of despair.

As the crying disappears.

Would a sliver of a smile begin?

Only to be able to laugh again.

-OM

44.1

Gentle

Saturday, a gentle breeze, I feel it deep in me.

A summer breeze, can it be, peaceful misery.

Winter set, on summer set, waking up the mind.

Past times, of future times, a life on rewind.

Gently now, please gentle now, fingertips in the glade.

One finger then, not the middle again, let the passion fade.

Come swiftly back, please come back, back to our home.

Don’t leave me here, past memory clear, left all alone.

-OM

44.1

Shine

I saw a shining light.

It shined, it shined, it shined so bright.

I could not stand the sight.

Of darkness folding before this light.

A brightness striking deep within.

Dispelling torrents of rage, amen.

A beauty I did not wish to see.

A reflection of something lost in me.

-OM

44.1

Everything is everything

One day I’ll look back on my life,

And see how the ink has dried.

What roads I’ve chosen to take,

where stars did not collide.

Everything is everything,

or so they want me to think.

Until it all becomes nothing,

through dreams they speak.

-OM

44.1

One more year I guess

I created this blog January 3rd, 2013.

Today I got billed again, I guess I’ll keep going another year since it auto charged me.

My dream last night was horrible and frustrating… my wife left me and my kids were gone and I couldn’t find them. This dream was particularly painful because for some reason I was in Korea and she suddenly disappeared with my Gracie. I’m not sure where Anna was.

My focus though was suddenly on searching for an address on my phone. All I could do was keep trying, but the search function kept not working.

I tried over and over.

It was the address for my birth mom in Busan.

I was so focused on that, I couldn’t run to my wife and kid each time I saw them. It was like I was trapped between two wants.

What’s particularly sad is – I’ve given up looking for my birth mom and sister and have tried to move on.

I don’t even want to see them anymore, but I’d die if I lost my wife and kids. So this dream was particularly fucked up.

Jason

44.1