I didn’t come here to make friends

Disclaimer: Multiple usages of the word Fuck, a few Damns, and I may have said Shit once.

I work in the IT world as a director. I run team members from Arizona, to Colorado, to Pune India. The reason I’m good at my job is because I don’t go to work each day with the mindset that I’m going to make a new friend that day. I’m a deadline oriented guy who is driven to meet goals and obligations I’ve set for myself and my team. I actually used that same mindset here on this blog when I built it seven years ago.

I didn’t make any friends yesterday.

We are on this project to remediate servers and currently we are stuck on two boxes for a product team that controls terminal downloads. We were given the task late in the game to in place these boxes to 2012 because they failed to find a way to push them over to new 2016 boxes. It’s a long story, but suffice to say that apparently my name is on the side of the building and it became my job to look after the entire fucking infrastructure of the whole damn world. That’s fine, even though I’m director of Release Management twice and file load Broomfield, if you want me to hold the very fibers of the world together I can do that too. I have two hands.

I asked for a weekday window to do this work. I was denied by product and was told we need to do this over the weekend, particularly Sunday since God isn’t busy that day. Sure boss, it’s your world, and I know my guys can do it so I told product yes. This was all dependent on us getting the development box upgraded and getting sign off yesterday though. I swear I’m going somewhere with this, just stick with me.

So we spend all day working through an issue we hadn’t seen to beat the status call at noon. Over the past year and a half my guys have done over 150 boxes in place and we hadn’t seen an application or software yet treat 2012 any different from the 2008 OS, but the stupid fucking application wouldn’t run its service and we were stuck. So we were knocking at it, one team on the call with the vendor, the other team was working with me trying reinstalls and such.

We hadn’t found a solution by the time I got on the noon call, so I asked for another hour. We still hadn’t found an answer by 1 pm, so I braced myself and got on the call anyways.

The product manager immediately starts digging in that we need to “no go” this weekend release and even named the call “Showstopper.” Keep in mind that I have till the 16th to close this damn project, and if you’re bad at math that doesn’t give me another Sunday window. I pointed this out to him and asked if we could continue to troubleshoot and get Saturday support tomorrow on testing from his product testers.

“Well Jason… there’s only five business days and you guys don’t even have a solution in sight.”

I About Lost It.

Are you fucking kidding me man? Only five business days, well aren’t we lucky that Korean Jesus gave us seven damn days in the week. The seventh day being the one you already wrangled me into forcing my guys to work, so don’t give me this bullshit about business days when we’ve already moved past that window.

I politely told him, in my normal forceful way, that it behooves is all to allow the trained technicians we have to find this solution. It is also only 1 o’clock, let’s give them time. We aren’t calling this yet.

Fucking kidding me, tapping out in the 3rd round when we have 9 to go? I’ll never be a follower of that weak mindset.

10 minutes after the call we found the solution on one site and performed the solution on the following after.

Never say die.

So yea… no new friends this week. Get the fuck outa here with that shit. And I have to work another Sunday.

Fuck me.

-Opinionated Man

17 thoughts on “I didn’t come here to make friends

  1. So much feels in this post. High five from long distance IT person here! You did well and I believe my supervisors will do the same if we were in the same position. Having friends is the last priority and most often shouldn’t be part of our tasks. Just a bonus if we found good ones even if we’re a mess sometimes 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I get this. Didn’t think I would at first, but I do. And I’m comfortable saying that neither do I care about making friends at work. There is a skill set for patient care and I feel no compulsion to utilize those skills – empathy, etc – on coworkers, especially the whiny ones who actually think it’s okay to complain to patients about THEIR health issues.
    I digress.
    ‘Weak mindsets , – I think there’s a big Hospital committee in our division, ‘ Weak Mindset Management Collective’ that meets every third Monday😉

    Liked by 2 people

  3. This is why I left that world (mgmt) and never looked back. You had it easy. My first project I was given 6 months to implement with a team of 4, no problems. One month into it and on person quit, no problem. Two months into it the DB manager stepped aside and gave the project to his subordinate, who didn’t like our DB design so said we’d have to redo it, her boss wouldn’t override her, my boss (new, the original one was forced into retirement) refused to intervene. Four months into the project (DB redesigned and all of the existing coding and design updated) another team member announced she applied for a position in a different area and was approved. Talked to my manager, wouldn’t budge on the implementation date, would have to live with it. Last month the remaining team member was taken away half-time, the users wanted changes made now that they saw their application in action, no change on the deadline. Implementation date comes (Saturday), everything goes in, the newly designed database doesn’t work as she said it would, she changed the design, I had to recode 14 applications, by myself, and get them up and running by 6pm Sunday. My boss handed in a bad review to his boss and blamed me for everything.

    Liked by 1 person

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