1 – Squeeze tube sour cream! I’m just impressed someone out there is still being innovative and looking for ways to improve our lives. I don’t buy those tubes anymore because the one time I did I squeezed it too hard and cream got everywhere. Then I had to use a spoon to scrape off half of it thereby defeating the purpose of the tube…
2 – All of you! Well… some of you…
3 – WordPress – because without it I’d have no place to complain. Actually that’s a lie. I complain all the time in real life.
4 – The jackwagon the other day driving like a lame duck in the left lane and that then tailed me while aggressively showing me the middle finger because I passed you on the right in a turn lane. I’m thankful your middle finger works you old cow.
5 – Taxes and the pot hole I ran over yesterday. But you keep taking your large cut government, I’m sure it is going somewhere. You old cows.