Disclaimer: Language & Opinion
They say to never write in anger. They say “professional bloggers” leave passion at home. Well if anything this proves I am not a professional blogger and will probably never be a professional writer. I am writing this while angry.
This morning I shared this link https://www.yahoo.com/news/adopted-3-brought-us-korean-man-deported-222504748.html about a South Korean that was adopted as a child, abandoned again, separated from his sister, and then was incarcerated as an illegal immigrant once he applied for a green card. I then made the mistake we as social media users should know not to make. I read the fucking comments in the yahoo article and my blood pressure soared to heights unknown. If there had been an app available for me to punch people through the internet in the balls I would have downloaded that shit immediately. Fuck humans can be stupid.
This comment really got me.
What this fucktard doesn’t know is that there is no way for this adoptee to have stolen that Korean bible. That bible was fucking his! That is the only possession we have when we get off the fucking plane into this foreign world we never asked to be a part of. It is the only thing I had as well and I still have my bible as a reminder of the country that shipped me off and didn’t want me. I have mine as a reminder of my rejection.
The problem with social media and media in general is everyone gets a voice. Now I know that is ironic and perhaps even hypocritical coming from me considering what I do for a hobby. Today, today I don’t give a flying fuck if that makes me a hypocrite to say that. Today I don’t give any fucks what you think.
When you make comments on articles, facebook posts, or whatever media you read people do see your words. We read them with the article, before the article, or after it. Your ignorance is never hidden and is never only seen by the people you want it to be seen by. We see your stupid virtual mouth opening and the even dumber words pouring from it.
So people can’t understand how this guy doesn’t speak Korean? So people can’t understand what the big deal is about him being sent back to Korea, a country he never knew? I’ll explain for those people even though none of them will read this blog.
I am thirty-five years old and I was adopted at the age of 3. I was separated from my birth sister in the orphanage and I have since that time never met her again. I stay awake many nights imagining what she might look like. I sometimes cry myself to sleep wondering if she even remembers me. I remember her in the only language I know, English, and I understand that Korea is my birth country. But Korea will never be my home. It will never be my country.
It is so simple right? He is Korean originally… so send him back! What harm is there? Let me give you all a little insight. It is a big fucking deal! For adoptees… Korea hates us. For adoptees… Korea will never be for us. I have known Koreans through my life and have been to a Korea a couple times since my adoption. Each time I went I traveled there as a visitor and a tourist. Every time I have met a Korean and let them know I was adopted I have felt their discomfort. You see we are marks of shame. We are walking, talking bodies that never should have been. For what greater tragedy is there than a walking failure before your eyes? That is what we are to Korea. That is why it is so hurtful when we are rejected by the only country we know and people tell us to “go home.” We are home.
Asians have a hard time in America. We are never given much credit, we are expected to perform at certain levels, and we are never considered for our feelings. The stoic, stereotypical image of your Asian man is the same image most people have in their minds. That is due to television, that is due to our culture, that is due to how we are made and interact. But that isn’t who we are. We are people and we hurt as well. It hurts us when people assume we can get over things so easily… like being sent back home after our long “field trip” to America.
I won’t look at the comments anymore on this article. So much ignorance, so many keyboard warriors, online experts, and not enough time for me to bash every single one I hate. Make no mistake, I hate some of these comments and the people that left them. Whether from ignorance, obliviousness, or whatever their reason… their words warranted a response and my response today is hate. This article and situation has me very angry.
I cannot imagine how much this guy has gone through. Children of abandonment never fully heal and they never “move on.” No matter how many times people tell us to get over it, still we know deep down what we are. We are the forgotten and the unwanted. We were never meant to be in most cases. And yet still someone above decided we deserved a chance, decided we deserved a day of light. So we live each day knowing we are on borrowed time. I can’t imagine what I would do if I were suddenly told that I had to move back to Korea. I would probably kill myself.
For those people saying “well he is a criminal that stole a car” please take that garbage elsewhere! If we deported criminals in this country we would be deporting thousands of people daily… and we aren’t! This man has also been held in a holding cell for 9 months away from his wife and kids and that is due to being “illegal” and has nothing to do with stealing cars. It doesn’t even say when he stole the car! I am not making excuses for breaking the law, but for fucks sake people read a little into the story before passing judgement.
This situation totally breaks from the normal debate I have on adoption and what people deserve a second chance. Yes, believe it or not there are constant debates on this between people that hate adoption and those that are for it. Between adoptees rejected AND abandoned by their birth parents, like this man and like me, and those birth mothers that feel they were tricked into the process. There are even wars between adoptees and foster care children on who deserves to be helped first. The reason this story is so different is because you have a man that was both an adoptee and in the foster care program. That makes him only one thing really – Unwanted. That is the harsh reality of it all and why those children of abandonment shouldn’t fight one another. We are all the same and we all want the same thing. To finally be wanted and accepted.
America should do something about this case and any case like it. It isn’t enough to change the law for people adopted after the year 2000. If you are adopted as a child and had no control over being sent here, you are a citizen of this nation in my book. You deserve to be here and you now have no other home.
What is happening to this man is wrong. I am still angry about this, but my anger has turned into sadness. This could have easily been me.
Jason Chandler Cushman
Ahn Soo Jin
My birth sister below.