Depression Settles at the Bottom

IMG_3010

I don’t view depression as waves, at least not for me. My depression feels like white flakes in a snow globe and are activated when something shakes me to my core. I become the center and the space around me becomes my world, a world I cannot see. While blinded I feel my swinging mood aiming for me like a gauntlet and I am the fool that has entered into it blind. No matter how hard I try, I simply cannot escape.

It has been 17 years since I found out about my birth mom and my sister. It has been 12 years since I tried to kill myself the first time. It has been 9 years  since I found happiness again. Through those transitions I have relearned my depression. Through those years I have grown to accept it and myself.

People always want to fix things. Fix your smile so it looks just right, fix your attitude so it fits your new smile, and while we are at it let’s fix your past so you can finally move on. Depression? Take these meds, a few more pills. Lay back down on this couch… aren’t you comfortable yet? Tell me about your problems so I can tell you why they aren’t really issues. Let me know all your concerns so I can explain how you created them. Men and women in white coats scribbling your life away in a second. Trying to find the answers when we don’t even know the question.

Depression settles at the bottom. It never goes away. It never “finally leaves.” When happiness slams the door who is the first to notice and peep their head from waiting closet? Who knows just the right words to whisper in your ear so that you question the answers you once had?

Feelings come like a shaking sun and all you can do is stand there in your crystal prison and wait.

Waiting for depression to settle once more.

-Opinionated Man

Jason C. Cushman

44.1

img_0379-27

OnWriting Flash Fiction

shutterstock_314299358

I want to say a big thank you Jason for inviting me to guest post on his blog and, of course, promoting my book, A Dash of Flash, in the first place. I really do appreciate it, Jason.

So, given such a kind invitation, I thought I’d share a little about how I became involved in writing flash fiction on WordPress and what I’ve included in the book.

I’ve been writing flash fiction on my blog since January 2015. I must be honest and say that until that time, I’d never even heard of it – or micro-fiction, as it’s often called. It was reading and commenting on a story written by fellow author, Mara Fields, that introduced me to it. Mara simply suggested I should ‘have a go’.

The challenge Mara had responded to was Monday’s Finish the Story so my first piece of ‘flash’ was written for that one. As many people on WordPress will know, the lovely host of that challenge, Barbara W. Beacham, sadly passed away in the middle of last year, so that challenge no longer exists.

After posting my first-ever piece of flash fiction, Homework  (which provided an image and a first-line prompt) I rapidly became hooked. Before long I was participating in three other challenges as well, including Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle Wisoff Fields, Picture it and Write, hosted by Eliabeth and Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers hosted by Priceless Joy. Unfortunately I couldn’t keep up with so many and gradually dropped all but PJ’s FFfAW, which I still do when I have time.

There are now many writing challenges out there, with word limits ranging from 6 words to 500 plus, and I’m often very tempted by some of the prompts I see in my Reader. But for the past few months I’ve not only been trying to ‘get on’ with Book 3 of my Viking trilogy, I’ve also been putting many of my flash pieces into a book – which is now, thankfully, done. This is the cover, which I like because it’s rather old fashioned, like me:

A Dash of Flash (Small)

I already had more than enough stories on my blog to use in the book but I also wanted to include new material. So I’ve written a lot more stories, some of them much longer than the ones for the challenges. Since anything up to 1,000 words is generally accepted as ‘flash’, I’ve included half a dozen which almost reach that limit. Several are between 500 and 1,000 words but most are around 200-300 and none are less than 100. Some of the flash stories already published on my blog have been tweaked or extended to make more rounded stories.

Many of the flash fiction books I’ve seen on Amazon are quite short and there are a couple out there with barely a dozen stories. I wanted to make mine a longer book so I aimed for novella size. I’d read that novellas are typically between 18, 000 and 30,000 words and my book of 85 stories eventually weighed in at 22, 287 words, including titles but not the front and back matter. The stories themselves are an eclectic mix of contemporary and historical, with a few fairy tales amongst them.

I also decided to include images to illustrate the stories. These are not the original prompts provided for the challenges: most are from Shutterstock or Pixabay and a few are my own photographs. Although I had enough images for all 85 stories, I settled for just 30 to brighten the book up. These are three of them:

Publishing this type of book is all new territory for me, so I’ll just have to be patient and see how it goes. I enjoy writing flash fiction a lot but it really ought to come with a word of warning:

THIS ACTIVITY IS TOTALLY ADDICTIVE.

But it’s also a whole lot of fun!

My ebook  A Dash of Flash is available on Amazon US, Amazon UK and Amazon AU and will soon also be available in print, courtesy of CreateSpace.

Man Code

They keep reading our posts so we will just use man code. The goose calls at midnight and the cow jumps over the moon. Beware the snakes at noon and buy more beer. Oops. I mean get more provisions…

The cat meows while chasing tigers and four eggs hatched tomorrow. Turn over the bacon.

-OM

Blogging 101** “Have Fun”

I admit. Sometimes blogging hasn’t been fun for me as well. 🙂
Note: Comments disabled here. Please visit their blog.

saywhatumean2say

pictures by Pusheen.comCatBloggingPusheendotcom

I say what I mean and I mean what I say

unless of course I’m blogging today

Sometimes when I’m blogging, I do not have fun

but each of those posts give my own sorrow tongue

Most my other posts give me sheer delight

because mostly I say all the things that I like

I have so many posts I’ve yet to create

and so many others to read, I can’t wait! 

                                                                                                                          ~~dru~~
** https://aopinionatedman.wordpress.com/2016/08/24/blogging-101/
PusheenReading

View original post

OM said I’d lose friends by posting about aluminum foil.

God Jim get the doors. I’ll grab the spears and man the wall! -OM
Note: Comments disabled here. Please visit their blog.

Random Writings on the Bathroom Wall

aluminum-foil-1-1

Is it aluminum foil or tin foil or al-u-minium foil?  I dunno.  I don’t even know why I’m wondering why I’m wondering how it’s exactly pronounced.

So anyway this guy says I’ll offend someone with this post.  So I say “Oh yeh?

Feel free to comment if you’re offended or not.

View original post