For Men Only – Relationship Talk

Men have you ever encountered one of those situations where it is always your fault? Like the time you dropped that cake on the way to the wedding reception that she had just spent all day laboring to bake. How were you to know that you would trip over the one blind talking rabbit on his way with his companions to a place called Narnia. Shit just happens. You didn’t mean to fail. You like to win.

I always think it is best in these situations to turn the argument back on the woman. It is of course a deflection tactic, but all is fair in the jungle. If she says “why didn’t you just crush that rabbit with your foot? Aren’t you a man?”

You of course say back “Baby… he was going to Narnia and had three companions that were Centaurs. What was I to do?”

-OM

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54 thoughts on “For Men Only – Relationship Talk

  1. A more fitting advice for a man whose girlfriend/wife is angry that he didn’t stomp a fluffy little woodland creature to death would be “RUN… RUN LIKE THE WIND!”

    Because seriously she’ll likely stab you next time you forget to take out the trash. A woman who doesn’t immediately melt at the mere thought of a bunny is not going to take any pity on you.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. To quote Tim “The Tool Man” Taylor:

    “I get up in the morning and the first thing I do is apologize. Doesn’t matter what for, I just say, “Sorry, dear.” At some point in the day I’m going to do something wrong, this way I’m one up for the day.”

    Liked by 4 people

  3. I tried commenting earlier and my phone just wouldn’t let me, as though it knew I wasn’t supposed to! lol I wanted to say that the moment I see ‘for men only’ I absolutely must read it! lol. I almost fell off my seat on the bus reading your post Jason! lol you poor guys. Even I struggle with dealing with women, how much more for you lot! πŸ™‚

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Everyone just needs to be on the same freaking page. There are certain realities that you just have to accept when it comes to relationships, but if you’re open about it, it’s so much better!
    I just published a comprehensive (gross hyperbole) guide on dating in the 2010’s and you might find it of use. HAHA

    Liked by 2 people

  5. I just let them think they won. They like winning too, and often don’t spot the ambush when I turn the situation around on them.

    “Yes honey, I’m scum. The worst ever. Remember when you smashed the car into a light pole last week, and I didn’t make a big deal out of it? Yeah.”

    Liked by 4 people

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