Reasons I Support SheForHe


Because women are so awesome they support men by making unbiased hashtags and movement names.

Because I love it when movie stars and actresses become overnight “movement leaders” by making one impassioned speech.

Because the feminist movement needs more Asian men in it.

Because these tag names are so damn catchy.

Because I needed one more reason to believe feminist really don’t hate men.

Because the feminist movement has strayed so far from its original goal that we must now hashtag it out so the world knows the truth.

Because everyone believes we must. And that seems to be the way of the world these days.

-OM

Guest Post – We are turning our kids into criminals


Our society today is incredibly superficial. No one looks at inner beauty anymore and we thrive on constant pointless arguments. The goal of finding a peaceful balance seems to become further and further from reality with the press and new expectations that appear on a daily basis.

Walking through the store, a little girl pointed out what someone was wearing and immediately began negatively talking about the person. This was not a lady who had on incredibly revealing clothes, she was wearing some very tight and very brightly noticeable pants though. Her shirt was rather long covering all the essentials and actually creating a nice but vibrant outfit. I actually overheard the little girls grandmother tell her she should not say such things because of what the lady was wearing. She explained she was wearing tights under a dress, there was no cleavage showing and though she had on tights, you could not see her bottom.

The grandmother began a speech on not judging a book by its cover and never judge someone because they wear different clothes. She could be from another country or maybe she just liked being different. It was an honorable thing to overhear. It is not often I hear anyone correcting teens these days.

Our teens have began to get out of control. Most of them are disrespectful and lack manners. I know my children are expected to use their manners anywhere and everywhere they go. There are consequences for  being rude and I get complimented often on their behavior. So many teens think it is okay to argue, curse at, and put their hands on adults or younger children. I blame the parents for this, sorry for being honest.

As parents, we are supposed to teach and guide our children to do the right thing. If we do not, we end up with snot nosed little shits. I once had to babysit some children who made me ponder pulling my hair out. They were rude and demanded I clean their rooms because they refused. They did what they wanted, when they wanted, and never once said please or thank you. If you told them to do something, they told you no. I never watched those kids again, I declined every time I was asked.

Why is this okay? If the children had parents who busted their ass once or twice they may not be little demons. More and more kids are beginning to act like this now. If they get a swat on the ass they threaten to call child protective services. This is ridiculous and I feel if spanking is necessary as a punishment, it should be done. I do not mean beat your children. Child abuse is a big huge no-no in my book. I will call the police and child protective services over abuse. On another note, swatting your child on the ass with your hand is not abuse in my book. I understand not everyone feels this way.

It is statistically proven that there is more child and teen crime as “abuse” laws become more and more ridiculous. I do not fully understand why this trend has not been noticed or why no one has done anything about it. I have swatted my child in public, not hard of course, and had three different people thank me for punishing my child rather than letting her continue to throw an unnecessary fit because I would not get her the toy she wanted. I also do not take her out to the park or places like that when she acts up. It is the same with her brother. They act right or suffer the consequences.

This is how it should be. We are allowing our children to walk all over us and then wondering why they are turning into criminals. Possibly because we teach them no discipline or how to respect authority. This is why we have some of the issues we have today and I do not feel anyone can convince me otherwise.

Teach your kids manners and respect, that is all!

Read more of my articles at http://www.raphsodibreece.wordpress.com

Guest Post – I Am A Feminist: 10 Reasons Why


I am a feminist.

I believe in women’s rights, and in women standing up for themselves at any cost.

I’ve often heard men complain about feminists, and make ignorant comments about our “whining” for equal rights and respect. Society often pictures us as masculine women who don’t shave, and hate men. Some even think that all feminists are lesbians.

Though that is true for some, That is normally not the case.
I am a petite, feminine, heterosexual woman who is in a committed, long-term relationship with a wonderful man. I do not hate men, and I do shave.

But my friends still consider me a feminist.

In other words, I have turned into a strong woman that does not put up with sh*t from men, and I will confidently open my mouth to any derogatory, or misogynistic speech or behavior towards my gender.

Throughout my life, I have developed different feelings for the male population ranging from fascination to anger. Sadly, the most superior feeling that I’ve had is fear.

Why am I a feminist? Here are some events in my life that lead me to feminism.

1. Boys often chased me to kiss me as a little girl:

In 1st grade, random boys would chase me, grab me, and kiss me. Most adults thought that it was cute but as a 6 year-old child, I was afraid and uncomfortable. I didn’t understand why it was okay for them to touch me and I didn’t understand why adults didn’t stop them.

2. Boys spied on girls in the bathrooms: I even recall one boy who tried to spy on us when we would use the restroom. One time he peaked under my bathroom stall as I sat on the toilet. Of course, adults attributed this to him being “curious”, and his punishment was nothing more than a warning. Because of the lack of consequences, he continued to do it. From then on I was too embarrassed to use the bathroom and avoided it at all costs. People assumed that it was “just boys, being boys” and didn’t bother correcting their behavior. To this day I have a slight fear of going to the restroom alone.

These “curious” boys grew up to be men that viewed women as objects. Behavior that could have been easily corrected was left unresolved.

3. I was controlled: In middle school I had a boyfriend that tried to control me. He was my first boyfriend. He often insulted my hair style choices, and even my clothes. He would say that my hair was ugly, and said that he couldn’t be seen with me unless I stopped dressing so “Gothic”. I didn’t think anything of it, and agreed to it. I began dressing in v-neck, brightly colored clothes and wore push-up bra’s to impress him.

Only then was he okay with letting his friends know that I was his girlfriend. Once they found out, they referred to me as “DSL”. Believe me, you don’t want to know what that means– but in short, it has something to do with my full lips. Once I found out what it meant, I felt humiliated. I asked him to stop, but he said, “It’s a compliment, calm down.”

4. I was intentionally hit by a boy: During the local high school football game (that most middle school students attended) I confronted that boyfriend about his controlling behavior. My friends were by my side. They had told me that I needed to let him know that the way he was trying to control me was not okay.
Once I was done talking, he slapped me across the face and laughed with his friends.

I wasn’t brave enough to fight back, but one of my friends, who witnessed the incident, slapped him back even harder. She wasn’t even slightly nervous about possibly being struck herself. She was fearless and he walked away. I felt empowered by her ability to stand up to men.

5. I was sexually harassed in school hallways: In high school there was a boy that would slap my butt as I walked down the hallway. This was a guy that I was once friends with, but our friendship ended abruptly and then he began the inappropriate, sexual behavior. The slap would be hard enough that it would sting even 5 minutes after. I was usually too shocked and terrified to say anything about it. My response was to ignore it. I didn’t know what else to do. I wasn’t taught about defending myself.

But there was one incident where I did develop the courage to stand up for myself. I was fed up with avoiding the hallways, and fed up with being afraid of him. The result of that? The guy mocked me, attempted to do it again, and walked away laughing. I cried from the humiliation. People saw it, but just stood by and watched.

6.“Men are better than women”: This is something that I have heard from a lot of men throughout my life. They claimed that they were superior, that they were more intelligent, that they were meant to be the bread-winners, and we’re meant to just pop out kids and take care of the household.

There was a time that I was having a political discussion with a man about future political candidates, and he was very opinionated about Hillary Clinton running for president. He didn’t see Hillary Clinton as a good candidate. His reason?

“Hillary Clinton can’t be president. She’s a woman. Women are too emotional to be able to handle that stressful of a job.”

A grown, 30-something year old man made that comment. I wondered if he even noticed that he just blatantly disrespected my gender, or if he was so accustomed to thinking that women were less that men that he really believed that he said nothing wrong.

Later he realized that I had been offended. His response to that was, “ It’s not your fault, it’s in your DNA. Women weren’t built to handle jobs that were meant for men.”

I think that was suppose to be some sort of apology.

7. Sexual Assault: Before I begin with this, sexual assault is defined as ANY unwanted, sexual contact or behavior without the explicit consent of the other individual involved. In other words, unless the person explicitly says yes, you have no reason to touch, or force yourself on to them.

I unfortunately experienced this. We were friends, and I had been crying after a long relationship had ended. He asked if I wanted to talk privately, and I said yes. And that is when it happened. Luckily, it was caught on camera and was reviewed by police. The guy who forced himself on me claimed that I had been “flirting” with him through text messaging, and in person. It wasn’t true, but even if it was, it does not give you the right to continue to touch me as I push you away and resist.

The police encouraged us to press charges because the incident fell under 4th degree sexual assault. My parents made the decision not to press charges, and wanted to put the incident behind us. What is the saddest part about this occurrence is that he genuinely thought that he did nothing wrong, and that somehow his behavior was my fault.

This is clearly a problem within our society, and this behavior is continuously supported by negative media images, inadequate parenting, and insufficient consequences.

8. My mother was assaulted by a man: A couple of years ago, my mother told me that when she was pregnant with my older sister, a teenage boy (about the age of 16) ran up to her and attacked her. She shielded her stomach, but he was able to forcefully punch her in the back of the head. The boy ran away with his friends. They were previously staring at her as she walked down the street. She didn’t know him, and he was just a kid. She speculated that it may have been a dare by his friends for him to punch a pregnant woman. There were several people on that sidewalk, and he chose to target a full-term, pregnant woman. I believe that misogyny played a role in that attack because she was the most vulnerable victim– a pregnant woman.

9. My mother was often harassed by men: As a little girl, I witnessed my mother being harassed by men when we would go shopping. My mom was often alone with us because my father was normally out of town on business trips.
Some of these men would whistle, others would make disgusting, inappropriate comments– yes, right in front of my sister and I (we were 4 and 5 years-old). My mother often ignored them, and I presumed that this was just the way girls were suppose to be treated.
One day as we walked into K-mart, she became brave and said something back to an older man who had made revolting comments as she walked by. It turned into a scary altercation. He was enraged that a woman had the nerve to stand up to him. I hid behind her in fear–and thus I developed my first feelings of fearing men.

10. A former boss made sexual comments to me: Under no circumstances is it EVER okay for anyone to make sexual comments to a co-worker or employee.This particular man offered me a cookie and when I declined he said, “You should eat it, it’ll make your breasts bigger!”.

That is only one display of his inappropriate behavior towards women, and doesn’t even dent the amount of times he was inappropriate. I just want to inform all the ladies and men out there that this IS sexual harassment and it IS against the law.

I know that people might say that these are just isolated experiences and that maybe it was just the area that I lived in. But how can that be when I’ve lived in the U.S Virgin Islands, California, and Maryland. If these were “just” isolated incidents, I wouldn’t have experienced it regularly throughout different stages of my life within different cultures and places.
This isn’t a matter of secluded events, this is an international problem, and it is a VERY real issue in America.

We are still being paid less than men for the same exact work with the exact amount of education and experience. This is even apparent in female dominated jobs.

A misogynistic response to this would be something like, “Well, women don’t work as hard as we do, that’s why they’re paid less”. This is both an ignorant and false statement. A study in 2013 by the Ponen Institute showed that women work longer, and even harder than men. So…why are we still being paid less?

It is because we are raising misogynistic generations. We allow words like “C*nt, b*tch, and wh*re to be thrown around in reference to women. In fact, we often encourage it in rap songs. Major motion pictures normally depict women as sexual objects, or damsels in distress.

It is because we are not teaching our sons how to respect women, and we are fostering generations that abuse and demean the female gender.

It is because we are not teaching our daughters that it is never okay for a man to disrespect you, or put his hands on you in any unwanted ways. In fact, the media and society are teaching women to use their bodies instead of their minds to reach their goals. They try to teach us that our value is in how we can please and impress men, instead of teaching us how to empower and love ourselves. Instead of women supporting one another we are having wars about “who’s body is better”, and pushing one another down in an effort to be approved by society and men.

I am expecting for many men to be offended by this post, and if they are, it may be because they are guilty of doing some of the things that I have described. My purpose in writing this was to be able to explain why I have chosen to fight for women’s rights. I do not hate men, but I have experienced events in my life (many that I did not cover here) that have shown me that we do need feminists and feminism. I have also met some wonderful men that treat women equally and respectfully, but that is difficult to come by. If you are one of these wonderful men, I thank you for your respect and for your contribution in helping women move forward.

I am a feminist, and I am proud. I didn’t really choose to be this way, but experiences and events have lead me to fighting towards women’s rights not only socially, but also politically and economically.

- Syanne

 

Visit me at: www.syannecenteno.wordpress.com

Imagination Unchained


I think one of the largest hurdles for a writer of any sort, regardless of the genre they write in, would be the lack of an imagination. To those of us that played with Mages, Kender, and Hobbits in our backyards this might sound insanely impossible. What would our worlds be like without our imaginary worlds combined that we lived in, journeyed through, and battled within our entire childhood? We were told constantly through school to focus and stay in the present. The problem is that it then becomes a chore and a foreign process to attempt to imagine as adults. Scientifically it has been proven that children have a higher aptitude for learning than adults by a certain age. We lose the glamour for learning, the need to imagine new things, and in turn our writing suffers.

I haven’t been many places in my life. I can name them and to some they may seem like a lot. Others would scoff and say that only having traveled around North America, a few igloos in Canada, and parts of Korea would be a small portion of the world. Not even worth called traveling perhaps? I said once that blogs are great windows into other worlds that we may never see. It is better than television because the pictures, stories, and the actual personalities you present are unique in and of themselves. It is because you are where you are right this moment that people will want to read your words. That shouldn’t take too much imagination to comprehend, but surprisingly people still struggle with the “why would anyone want to read my words” syndrome.

I have never traveled to the Great Pyramids. Still, I can close my eyes and feel the damp air. My shoulders start to weigh down from the rich history and the thought of so much stone above me. My eyes flicker and suddenly I am standing on the Great Wall of China. I have read a lot about this wall and it truly is remarkable. Although after walking the length of it I wonder how anyone could have thought you would see this thing from space. Still, it I feel like I am standing on so many lives… since I recall that they buried the bones of the workers into the wall itself.

I think there are many of us that live in a state of not always being here. My wife laughs and says I zone out a lot. Actually, not to correct her or anything because women are always right, I am not technically zoning out as much as I am zooming in… like a camera. And I can see images around me all the time in my head. Sometimes it causes chaos, but still other times it is simply amusing. I have always needed something to do and I guess my internal entertainment system set me up for life. Maybe this is a mental disease and some doctor has a really long term for it in some book.

You can keep your term and kiss my ass.

-Opinionated Man

Gay Marriage… Taking A Stand


Opinionated Man:

I actually agree. Gay marriage should be legal and I also disagree with my own church’ s stance on it. Well said. -OM
Note: Comments disabled here, please comment on their post.

Originally posted on mthomaswhite's Blog:

“Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.” -First Amendment, United States Constitution

Gay marriage should not really be a question. Legally, it’s a moot point. We have no laws making it legal for the government to discriminate against anyone based on their personal belief. If two men or two women wish to marry, the government is not legally capable of preventing it. For the government to do so would step on the beliefs of the individuals being married. So long as they are not interfering with the liberties of other individuals, any person has to the right to believe and act how they wish. I understand that there are certain things that…

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