You Need “Thicker Skin”

We hear this often when we enter into social media, but the reality of it doesn’t always register for most. That is because most people don’t encounter that much abuse online. Oh sure, you will get the occasional troll or “outrageous” comment directed to you on your blog or in the comment section of a website. These encounters though are usually mild or “as dramatic as you wish them to be.” Some people actually like drama.

In 32 years I have never had this amount of attention focused on me or my writing. It can be exciting, daunting, frustrating, and an adventure all rolled into one. I have found that I sympathize with celebrities and public personalities more and more. I place no lofty airs around my persona, but I have also read more hateful words directed towards me in 15 months than most of the previous years of my life. This is not a complaint, simply a reflection of fact, but it shows why I can understand how celebrities get fed up easily. I brought that attention on myself when I decided to write my thoughts in an unfiltered manner.

You need “thicker skin” if you wish to truly place yourself out on social media. When I mean “yourself” I really mean all of you, documenting your life and thoughts on issues is not something to take lightly. The world looks for the next person to persecute and who better for any angry mob to pick than one that actually speaks their mind freely? That is the REAL danger of social media and why people must be careful about what they say or at the very least they should have the balls to back it up. If you aren’t prepared to defend your view don’t put it out on the internet.


Facebook Likes???

I have to ask this because I don’t use Facebook often. Do people actually go back and “unlike” a page if they change their mind about liking someone? Or is this perhaps when people defriend me that the like disappears? My Facebook page, which I use to mirror my posts, keeps going up and down in likes. I find it rather amusing, but it begs the question who actually goes back and “unlikes” a Facebook page? Isn’t that time consuming? Do any of you?


Beware of

Have you all heard of this website? Those of you that live in the United States may want to look into it. Apparently this website gathers information about people and posts it as an open directory. I Google myself a lot, old habits, and I found this website a couple months ago. You have to email them to get your information removed and even then I am not sure they actually delete it. It is simply not shown anymore. This website will post your name, address, a google image of your home, your age, email, phone number, AND will attempt to link you to your family members. If you are in any way concerned over your identity and the safety of your credit it might be a good idea to write this website if you are on it.

This makes you wonder how much of your information is being shared without your knowledge. Think about it people.

-Opinionated Man

Facebook Phobia: Rehab

I sat down with a dear friend in her backyard one morning last year. The kids were starting their fun and we settled to catch up. Before I knew what was happening, my tech-savvy, happily tech-dependent friend laid out how easy it was going to be to GET ME ON FACEBOOK that moment. It was not the first time Tera had encouraged this recluse to join civilization. Nor had she been the only one. But this time my death grip on the comfort of simpler, slower times let up despite itself as she reasoned how quick it’ll be to snap a photo of me and jump-start my profile. She sounded so disarming. I warned her I take few solo shots and when I do, run 20 to delete 19. A blur of sixty shots later, we had done it. Indeed it was effortless and it was torture. I clutched my heart over a deep prick of pain. Tera chuckled. She cheerfully, so patiently picked out with me The One photo I okayed with hesitation.

My reluctance to Facebook was not just about the hermit in me. Yes, I’ve blogged some things personal. But I wrote largely in the quiet of my solitude. I didn’t know if I was ready for the noise of a pajama cocktail party. There was also the fear, a simple matter of keeping up with the times. Which, according to today’s M.O. means learning technology beyond the level of email. Yes, email is so 90s (and wonderfully so). Glancing at my husband’s Facebook page made me dizzy. Just so many…buttons. Things going on at once.

I watched in awe as Tera’s fingers flew over her phone. She went on to crop my photo – a whole art studio and tool shed in that device of hers. So many icons on the screen, shapes, a feast of choices as we uploaded my picture.

I recoiled. I was overwhelmed. Facebook was unfamiliar terrain. What technical functions did I have to learn?

Fingers tap danced briefly, and there I was. My smile greeting the masses. We hung the mask that had hid the recluse from the parade of life. In just a handful of clicks, I leapt out of the dark ages of my perceived security into a Brave New World. I was aware that the possibilities for online amity could only make swapping stories more enjoyable. But to put it plainly, change is hard.

Congratulate me: a naturalized citizen of social media and of postmodern humanity.

Holistic Wayfarer

The Day I Turned Down Huffington Post

I have a confession to make. Around the middle of last year I was approached by an editor of Huffington Post to be included in an article on fathers with opinions. I was at first flattered, but then after a couple back and forth emails I decided to decline. The issue was they wanted full disclosure of who I was… and I did not feel it was worth it. Many might call that a stupid move and 7 months later I am not sure if they aren’t right.

I do know that I still “think” I made the right decision and I won’t “sell” myself for a spot on a website or article no matter what company name it is. I just won’t.


HarsH ReaLiTy Facebook & Opinionated Man Twitter

See the right sidebar for my new Twitter and Facebook accounts or the below links. If you use these to follow me that is fine as well. I don’t talk on Facebook though. Thanks to anyone that follows and likes!


This Website is Pure WordPress

This site will no longer be connected to any other websites. No Facebook, Twitter, Instawhatever, or LinkedIn will be used. If you wish to follow this website I appreciate it. My email is posted but I would ask that you only use that for emergency reasons. Thank you to those that followed me on Twitter, I actually will miss my drunken 140 character rants…